I’m Gollum! ME! us. gollum! (well, our real name is Smeagol, that’s what my Momma used to call me) but Gollum is our stage name, if you know what we means. gollum! that’s the sound we make in our throatses. that’s where our name comes from.

We had several books written about us a while ago, they is called the Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit. Those books were written by JRR Tolkein, whom is our hero, Precious. We was invented by him. If you hasn’t ever read these books, you are stupid and need to stop reading this useless blog and go reads the REAL THING, Precious! If you don’t know what Precious is, you read the books and find out. This blog wasn’t written by JRR Tolkien, it was written by us. gollum! We also had movies made about us, starring us, based off of the books by JRR Tolkien. The newest one, which is officially called The Hobbit but ought to be The Gollum Movie, is coming verrrrry soon, oh yes my Precious.

IT’S MINE! MY OWN! MY PRECIOUS! not yours! MINE!!!!! Ours, precious. OURS. Yes whatever. I meant ours… shiny…